The world doesn’t care about you, you’re just another products.
This world is a place that is full of people that will come in the form of friends, lovers, and well-wishers; in the form of emotional adhesives, neatly packaged dreams, and aspirational lollipops; in the form of saviors, fixers and salespersons.
Believing in yourself when nobody else does is in fact the harder part of self-development. When there is no knowledge of self-belief and self-confidence, one will find it very difficult to put ideas into action which means you must learn to trust yourself first.
Generally, We all have the understanding that being confident in one’s self is one of the best traits to have as a person. In light of this, they are so many reasons to build self confidence and learning to believe in yourself when nobody else does is one first step to achieve that.
Here are the few things to know about you:
- A person is not born ready.
- A person has to be made ready.
- The person is emotional in nature.
- The person has to learn how to learn.
- The person can think, but does not know how to think.
All of these explains that a person’s emotional responses to different experiences create interpretation of those experiences, which the person assumes to be true.
So these are the ways to believe in yourself when nobody else does:
1. Accept Yourself
Before you believe in something, you must have a full knowledge of that thing.
It is so sad to know that almost every person walking on earth does not have the real idea and knowledge of who they truly are.
Before then, in other to gain full self-confidence; first, you need to be happy with who you are. You don’t necessarily have to be perfect but by making sure that you love yourself and that you trust yourself, you grow your self-confidence and trust in your own abilities. You must be confident and secure in whom you are, what you do, and what you have.
2. Do not Compare Yourself to others
Comparison is the thief of joy. Every time you compare yourself to another person, you will find something better, greater, or something you are jealous of in the other person. But what you are most likely to forget is that this exact person you are comparing yourself to is probably jealous of one of your unique features. Every human being is unique and great in itself and should not be compared to one another.
3. Understand Rejection
Rejection are normal – Start seeing it this way, and they happen to everybody!
Although rejections continue throughout your lifetime, they are most brutal in the initial years, a time when you are a little too passionate, too hopeful and a little too entitled. It might have been in your early years of schooling, when a teacher you really wanted to be noticed by somehow always past you as if you were an unwanted ad.
The sensation felt from that experience was “Am I invisible to them?” Your mind is unable to come up with any rational explanation for such behaviour from others, and youre too embarrased to open up to your parents about it.
A heartbreak, opportunity lost, and isolation may make you feel its just the end of the world. So depending on your fearfulness, strenght, weakness, you make a decision about what to do with the voice saying: I am not special. In short, you get screwed because you havent been told that rejections are fucking normal, mate!
Being Motivated by rejection is not really a good idea.
Of many outcomes of rejections, three of the results could be.
- I am going to accept that I am a loser.
- The world doesn’t notice me; therefore, I will become successful to be noticed. I will show them!
- I am going to declare that the world is unfair; basically, a shitty place, and devote myself to blaming, hating, and spreading toxicity.
If you think the second is powerful, Kudos! Well, not really. That person is going to be successful only so they can prove to others that they are somebody. And, in that pursuit, they will most probably chase success blindly, ignoring what they actually want to do, because their prime motivation isnt to be self-satisfied but to satisfy others.
And heres the fatal flaw behind this motivation; The desire to prove something to others requires that these “others” actually care, but the truth is they dont. You are the only one invested in what becomes of you. And the only thing these “others” are interested in, is what becomes of them.
Those who are able to find out what they want to do in life chase after greatness to prove to themselves that they are great at what they do. And with time, they realize they dont need anybodys approval, as doing what they want to do gives them purpose, and fulfilling that that purpose gives them satisfaction and a meaningful life.
4. Understand Failures and Losses
Just like rejection, Failure and losses are normal. Without a fundamental principle on how to see failure and losses as normal. Wherever you don’t succeed in something you care about, the first thoughts are; I am a fucking idiot, I am nothing, I am a loser, I don’t deserve anything, I deserve to die. In many ways, these feelings are accompanied by fear of what other people see us as.
This chain of self-harm needs to be broken with the deep understanding and knowledge that failures and losses are normal, and a solution that directs all those highly powerful negative emotions into something useful. To understand that, you need to first understand how winning is done the right way.
It starts with a question: “You wanna do this, right?” This may actually seem like a simple question, but, my friend, there is a difference between wanting to do something and having to do something.
“To win, the very first thing you need to clarify in your mind is, do you really wanna do this?”
The three possible answers to the question above are: Yes, No, and I don’t know. The answer, No, and I don’t know, occupy a great many people. The argument they make is, we are not successful because of our lack of interest in the thing.
This is a highly misplaced argument because it assumes that everybody who is successful must be deeply in love with what they do. That is quarter of the truth, which means it is 75% bullshit. people are succesful for a number of reasons:
- A hunger for money, status, power.
- A hunger to avoid poverty and depression
- A hunger to prove in your own eyes that you’re capable
- A hunger to provide for those whom you love and are dependent on you.
Success is a matter of choice irrespective of the type of hunger that motivates it…
5. Forget Happiness, It’s Not the Same as Satisfaction
Everyone wants happiness from life. Behind most of your actions, choices, and relationships, the demand is happiness. What you haven’t realized is that happiness is not the same as satisfaction. If you were simply asked, “Do you feel satisfied with your life?”, your mind will look for an answer either elsewhere or someplace deeper than where happiness resides. “I may feel happy, but I don’t know if I am satisfied.”
There are people who can sense bullshit of any kind from a mile away – That should be your goal. This means, when you are watching the news or being told anything, you’re able to separate data from the narrative. Not to forget, narratives too have data about how people collectively think and how to make people think what they weren’t thinking before.
Try this: Never compare yourself to anybody.
You are you! The more time you spend learning and trying out what makes others happy and what others do seems impressive and cool, the more time you’re wasting. Ultimately, all that is going to matter is the knowledge of yourself – that is the only thing that will make sense and the only thing that will give you satisfaction in life, regardless of your age, what your net worth is, and what your relationship status is.
The knowledge of you is what matters. If you dont realize this now, time will eventually make sure you find out about this, but then it may be too late.
Finally, in a recap, Here are the 5 ways to believe in yourself even when no one else does:
- Accept yourself
- Do not compare yourself with others
- Understand Rejection
- Understand Failure and Losses
- Forget happiness, it’s not the same as Satisfaction